On Birth, Borrowing What’s Not Yours & Responsibility

T: This is a Sutta from Aṅguttara Nikāya, X,65. Somebody’s asking Ven. Sāriputta, “what is happiness, and what is suffering?” And he replies: “Birth is suffering. No birth is happiness. When there is birth, you can expect this kind of suffering: cold, heat, hunger, thirst, defecation and urination, contact with fire, sticks and knives, and relatives and friends get together and annoy you. When there is birth, this is the kind of suffering you can expect. When there is no birth, you can expect this kind of happiness: no cold, heat, hunger, thirst, defecation or urination, no contact with fire, sticks or knives, and relatives and friends don’t get together and annoy you. When there is no birth, this is the kind of happiness you can expect.” But there is no birth, so…

N: Yeah, so how should, then, birth be understood? That’s the point.

T: Life taken personally.

N: Yeah, well, that which is born, taken personally. The Buddha describes birth as coming out of the womb and manifestation of the aggregates into this world. But people seem to sort of misconstrue that, in that they think that manifestation ended once they came out of the womb. No, that’s birth, and it still is.

T: Jāti.

N: Yeah, jāti, the manifestation that you are now, is all due to you coming out of the womb. So, all of this now—heat, cold, relatives—all of that is that birth, it’s because of that birth. So the birth is not confined to a little moment that lasted for half an hour on average, or an hour. No, manifestation persists, because of the birth, and the birth is the manifestation. So if you are manifested, you are born. In the same sense, you enter this country now. You cross the border. The fact is that now, wherever you are here, you are within the country, because you crossed the border, because you entered it. So you are manifested here now, and I don’t need to find out where you crossed the border, and how, and how long it lasted, or observe it. The fact that you’re inside of this country, I know that you must have crossed the border. So you were born. So your manifestation is what your birth is. That’s why paṭiccasamuppāda, when one is freed from ignorance, he frees himself from birth. You can’t undo coming out of the womb. But you can undo appropriation and ownership of that manifestation, which was your birth. Which was through your birth, which was because of your birth, which is what your birth is. Practically speaking, people would wonder, because often jāti is mentioned, birth is mentioned, in the Suttas.

T: Yeah, ‘birth is suffering’.

N: Birth is suffering, exactly, and all the suffering is birth, ageing, sickness and death, that’s all because of the assumptions and craving, taṇhā, and so on. So if birth is that physical coming out of womb, if it’s confined to that only, how can you undo that? You can’t. So, you’re then subjected to all of this because… Well, first of all, you don’t even have a memory of your own birth. You haven’t seen yourself coming out of the womb, you don’t recollect that. So if that’s your birth, truly, if it’s only confined to that event, it’s utterly inaccessible to you as something that you can understand, let alone abandon. But if you take birth to be a much broader phenomenon, such as ‘ah, this manifestation that endures here, sickness, ageing, cold, elements, words of others, that is basically manifested here, ageing and so on, that’s the birth, that’s because of the birth, that’s what birth is.’ Being born means being manifested. So for as long as that manifestation endures, your ‘birth’ is there. So you can, then, address that directly, by uprooting the ownership of it. By seeing that everything that’s within that manifestation, anything that manifests, whatever has the nature of manifestation, cannot be yours because of that. Because it has arisen on its own, and so on.

T: So, you are subjected to birth, subjected to ageing, subjected to death.

N: Fundamentally, you’re subjected to that. Not knowing you’re subjected to ageing, birth, elements, annoying relatives, you take the ownership. You assume it’s yours, you assume it’s you, you assume it’s for you, either way, it’s yours. And because of that, you suffer on account of it, and everything that pertains to that manifestation will be affecting you.

T: But if you don’t take it personally, the birth, the manifestation of aggregates… can I say ‘your life’?

N: Well yeah, your life is that which is manifested, in the broadest sense. So how can you then disown your life, without destroying it?

T: Because you can see that birth as that phenomenon that you are subjected to. Like, I didn’t choose to be born.

N: No, so this manifestation that you find in the world, your form, that is you, so to speak—you had no say in it, at all.

T: And so all these little projects, my wishes and dreams, and all my little things I’m doing, all my issues, cold, heat, and so on. When seen in the light of that greater context of birth not being mine, then all the little things which are inside it are affected.

N: Yeah, they will fade. Because that’s the problem, really. The problem is that despite the obvious, that you had no say in your form, in your birth, in your overall set of aggregates, you are subjected to it, people still assume the ownership of it, and perpetuate that ownership through acting out of that very form. Seeking pleasure in form, as the Buddha would say, as if it is theirs. So they know it’s not theirs, but when the pleasure presents itself, you act as if it is yours. You don’t care, in other words, so you act out because you can. In other words, you’re borrowing something because it’s free. Ignoring the fact that it’s still borrowed, so sooner or later you have to pay for it. So that’s why it’s always compared to Mara’s trap and similar. So you have to refrain from borrowing that which you know is not yours. What is not yours? Eye is not yours, ears, nose, mouth, body, feelings are not yours, thoughts are not yours. But you’re taking them as yours because you can, so to speak.

So that’s why you have to contemplate the danger, to undo that attitude of ‘oh I’ll just take this because I get a quick pleasure through it.’ Quick satisfaction, quick peace, through satisfying my desires. So you have to see the danger to prevent yourself from borrowing that which you know you shouldn’t. From taking the ownership of that which you know, deep down, you don’t really own.

T: But if you now see that non-ownership, that context of non-ownership in regards to birth, this manifestation, you develop that perception from time to time and make it steady, compose yourself in it. Maybe before you do that you’d think ‘now, you’re not going to really try to do anything in your life, because life is not mine.’ I don’t have to take responsibility, I can just sit down, relax, and let things go.

N: Of course, anything, even the most accurate of the instructions, can be taken wrongly if people don’t develop the right attitude and need to look for faults and look for an escape from responsibility. So you can’t possibly address that, you can’t possibly say… how can you prevent that from happening? Because that’s up for people to decide. So, all of the instruction presupposes that a person who is listening to this is authentic. Wants to be free from suffering, has already taken responsibility for their own situation and is not trying to avoid it, and wants to find a solution so that they can develop the freedom from suffering. But if a person doesn’t have that attitude, yeah, I mean the Buddha himself can be speaking and people would just hear what they want to hear, to justify what they’ve justified already before for themselves and avoid the responsibility for it.

T: So you don’t have to be throwing things away, destroying your body…

N: Well, no, exactly. That might be the first impulse, but then it’s like, well, so you’re destroying someone else’s property now? If it’s not yours, why do you think you have a right to destroy it? Not borrowing it does not mean destroying it, but yes, people would destroy it because for as long as it’s there, it’s tempting me to borrow it. Well, that’s the catch, to learn how not to borrow it. Not to destroy it so you’re not tempted. Then you borrowed it, you have to pay for it because you destroyed it.

T: ‘You broke it, you bought it.’

N: ‘You broke it, you bought it’, yeah, that’s exactly it.

T: So how to be in the world, and not…

N: How to be in the world and not be with the world? Precepts, thoroughly, taken seriously, seeing the danger in the slightest fault as the Buddha says. Guarding of the sense doors, as we’ve spoken about often, so it’s not like ‘I adhere to these precepts because I’m Buddhist’ or something. No, I adhere to these precepts because they are prerequisites for containing my mind that needs training. And then that training starts to be put in place through sense restraint and guarding of the sense doors. So, for example, when something is not against the precepts, but you still don’t necessarily do it if you know it’s rooted in desire, mentally. So you guard your sense doors because that’s where the problem is. ‘Is this rooted in unwholesome desire or not?’ Not, ‘is this wrong according to the letter of the rule or not?’ That’s how you start, but if you actually want to practise out of it, you have to take it up from those impersonal, mechanical observances and take responsibility for it.

So, ‘I keep the precepts because I want to develop the mind, and I also guard the sense doors and practise sense restraint on account of the same thing.’ It’s not an offence to eat between eight and twelve in the morning, but again, how much I eat, what I eat, why I eat, how often I eat, all of that is not against the precepts, but it can very much still be the behaviour that feeds your desire if you don’t check that as well. So you guard your sense doors, and you’re moderate, and you also practise sense restraint within the precepts that you already keep. So that’s how you basically fortify yourself against the direction and the pull of the world. So you’re in the world, but not with that world on that same level. And it’s the same whether you’re a monk or not.

T: You have to be contemplating the danger in that world as well.

N: Well yeah, that contemplation, you’ll be revolving around that one way or the other. If you already had enough determination to take on the precepts, and decide to practise out of them, yeah, that already implies some recognition of the danger of not doing so, danger of going back to the previous state of non-restraint, and so on. So that’s how you would basically fortify your mind, and then all these things that we talk about, non-ownership, seeing the greater context, then that can actually arise, can be seen. Now, people would not necessarily be able to see it because the mind is still far from that necessarily developed basis for it. It’s not dry enough from sensuality, it’s not withdrawn enough from company and dependence on others and so on.

T: You can’t see the signs and features of life.

N: Exactly, yeah, the signs and features that we recently spoke about that haven’t been developed sufficiently. So the context is limited. That doesn’t mean that it’s wrong, what that person might be understanding, but it’s not sufficient. So you need to, now, that context that you have developed, you need to now broaden it even further. Find a greater context to that, that you can then sustain.

T: If you understand, or you can be aware of the context of jāti, of birth being present, what is greater? What surmounts that, what context surmounts that? And I would say that’s the context of death.

N: What’s implicit in the manifestation is the cessation of manifestation, yeah.

T: So no matter how wonderful your life is, no matter how many things you’re doing or not doing, it’s just going to…

N: Yeah, it’s on the basis of a manifestation that you have no say in, that has its own direction and expiry date, and you’re not privy to that, it’s inaccessible to you. So you only see the front of it, given to you.

T: So now you develop the context of death, but you first have to develop the context of life, in a way.

N: Yeah, the context of death is developed correctly, mindfulness of death is practised correctly, if the extent of life is seen for what it is.

T: And then, in that sense when you understand the context of death, then…

N: Dispassion is the result. It’s not like ‘what do I do next?’ Nothing. Sustain that and you will uproot any passion, desire, ill-will, irritation, ownership, resistance, and so on, expectations in regard to any manifestation whatsoever. So whatever has the nature to manifest, that’s why it has the nature to cease. That’s it.

T: As you’re saying, you’re not going to be able to see that greater phenomenon of jāti, of birth, if you don’t have a clear mind.

N: Exactly, it’s just going to be an abstract theory, an idea. Sometimes people might sort of get the idea, but then recognise that it’s abstract and then they think ‘so now I need a new idea, or a better idea.’ No, now you need to elevate your mind to meet the abstracted idea so it ceases to be abstracted from it. So you need to bring your mind to where that idea is, not change the idea to fit where your mind is. And you bring that, again, through virtue, sense restraint, moderation, watchfulness, and so on. The direct training. That also implies responsibility. You cannot irresponsibly guard your sense doors. You cannot irresponsibly say no to your sensual desires. Because lack of responsibility is tied with the desire, with saying yes, with the flow, going with the grain. So if you are practising sense restraint and moderation and watchfulness, that implies responsibility.

T: Reflection.

N: Exactly. So the more you develop it, the more of that reflexive recognition of that responsibility you will have. ‘Oh I just carelessly, irresponsibly said no to sensuality.’ That’s impossible! That is impossible.

T: You would have to, in a way, keep asking yourself ‘what am I responsible for?’ I’m responsible for choosing, thus for action.

N: What am I responsible for, it doesn’t need to be anything specific. I am responsible for accepting this manifestation of this birth. For acting out of it as if it’s mine.

T: Am I responsible for creating birth?

N: Exactly, I’m not responsible for the manifestation of it, I’m not responsible for these liabilities of cold, hunger, and so on, whatever else bothering me. I’m not responsible for that, but I’m responsible if I take up the ownership of this form that’s experiencing all of that. So that’s how you, then, become invested in fearing cold, heat, elements, misfortune, craving for pleasure, craving for escape, craving for cover-ups, ill-will towards people that annoy you, and so on. Because you took the ownership of the basis that’s subjected to those things.